I tried to imagine how the evening must appear to Diane’s eyes. Five women, one man, at a slow, intimate dinner. Gentle conversation, interspersed w...th laughter and innuendo. Tasha made reference to the Xmas list, Diana didn’t look at all surprised. Was she here as part of that? I wasn’t sure… but it seemed likely. Five gold rings. Five stunning women. I played some Miles Davis over dinner, but then Jessica took over the CD player after dessert, and we had a diet of modern heavy metal, which. If either one of us finished with his three Navajos before the other finished, then he would take out the nearest fourth man. Naturally, we did not expect this to come about, but we wanted to be prepared for all eventualities.The scenario played out as planned, another surprise—how lucky could we get? The children were pushed into the shade and signed to sit down. The moment that they did, we started shooting. We were so close to the Navajos that it was another case of one shot, one kill. Three. Supposing one did get married ... like my first time.The number two cause is the reception.That's when you meet the child molesters and porn stars, my newly acquired brother in law. Not my wife's brother ... no ... her sister's husband. He happened to be both. Molester AND porn star ... which brings us to the funny uncle.I'd rather not talk about that.The crazy aunts; in this case they're my sisters in law. Bat shit crazy ... all four of them ... but the youngest one decided I should be married. We could sense Sparky and Turbo and they were mentally pointing to a far corner of the lot.There were two people in that corner and when we went purposely toward them they got in a car and left.The waitress came out thinking we had skipped and Tiffany said, "Somebody was fiddling with our car." Did they break in?" We have a radio operated alarm. They didn't get into the car, they were just trying. We better get our meal packaged. I don't feel comfortable here."The waitress said, "I'm sorry to.
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